"So Much Joy"

It's that time of year again. The 19th seems to sneak up so quickly every year. This year, though, I haven't been sad at all. I have just been so ... grateful. I simply cannot believe how immeasureably blessed I am. How much Heavenly Father loves me. How much He has given me. My cup, truly, runneth over.

I miss my wonderful, beautiful, grumpy, brilliant, bossy, thoughtful, kind, strong little sister. I miss her showing me her art projects. I miss finding little notes from her telling me she looked up to me. I miss her commanding me to do something. I miss making breakfast in bed for her. I miss dressing up the little kids and doing their hair with her. I miss her correcting my speech. I miss sleeping in the same room. I miss surprising my mom by cleaning the house from top to bottom. I miss our late night talks. I miss girls camp with her. I miss the time I had to spend with her.

I am so thankful to have so many things to miss about her.I am thankful that she would show me her art projects and write me little notes. I am thankful she would have me do things for her and that she would sleep in late enough for me to make her breakfast in bed. I am thankful that she would help me get the kids ready. I'm not so thankful for the speech correcting. But I am so thankful that we shared a room, cleaned the house, had late night talks. I am so thankful for our growth at girls camp. I am just so thankful for the time Heavenly Father gave me to spend with her. Those short 15 years have blessed me eternally. They give me so much hope.  So much joy.

Anna's funeral was one of the largest I have ever seen. People flew in from all over the western United States. Half of my high school and practically the whole staff of the elementary school was there. The middle school choir sat in the seats on the stand, as well as most of her classmates in the congregation. This girl brought so much joy to so many people. It brings me so much happiness to know that so many people cared about her, and about us.

Naturally, my mom spoke. She is an incredible speaker. Actually, she is an incredible person. I never once saw my mother get angry over the fact that her daughter was gone. Her heart was broken, of course. But she turned to the Savior instead of against Him. She turned her grief to Him so that He might comfort her. She wrote this poem and read it during her talk. And it continues to bring me joy.



Tonight I sit with you.

You seem so tired.

Your poor body exhausted in pain.

Soon my little one,

as you have asked, your pain will end.

But did you know how deeply mine would begin?

I hold your hand, and I remember…

So much joy, so much joy, so much joy!

Do you recall when you came to earth, such a short time ago.

My poor body then exhausted from pain,

In your sweet quiet way you looked into my soul,

and we rested with

so much joy, so much joy, so much joy.

Do you remember the night your sister was born?

Of course, you only two, could not remember details.

But you awoke and came to my side to comfort,

“Don’t cry mamma, our baby is here.

Look see our baby is here.”

Again, so much joy, so much joy, so much joy.

Your sweet deep gravely little voice,

The only child I intimately knew, to pitch a song in alto –

“Jesus said love everyone…”

Smart as a whip, memorizing your favorite stories

telling them with relish and embellishment.

So much joy in those memories, so much joy!

Sweet thoughts and memories run together, mesh and blend

Mom, I have a friend… This is the greatest day… an ‘A’ on a test

I love my Heavenly Father… I need a new dress… I have a job!

My brothers are so cool… I’m going crazy!

Will you help me with this?… What can I do?

We cleaned the closet!... That fireside was awesome

Spencer is my hero… I want to work at Primary Children’s

So much joy in you, so much joy, so much joy.

And now tonight, again, as you are leaving

you have given me a great and awesome gift…

Comfort, peace…

“Mom, your job with me is done.

There is so much joy, so much joy, so much joy.”

Malia Hale, March 2000

You have to see this

You guys, this is my nephew and one of the cutest videos you'll see! Hop on over to my sister's blog!

CSFTDBMS: Installment 3

Imagine you just turned 16.
You take your 15 and 13 year old sisters to the library to study.
Because it is just cooler to study at the library than it is at home.
You were a shy little 16-year-old, you didn't talk to boys. Not that you didn't like them, but you were just scared of them.
You find a table that has a lot of foot traffic next to it so lots of people keep walking by.,
So you are sitting there with your sisters just studying away.
You get really into your history assignment reading about JP Morgan and his millions
When all of a sudden, the ugliest boy you have ever seen is right in your face trying to kiss you.
You extend your arms pushing him away.
His ugly face is very close, so you turn away.
He backs away and looks at you with a slight tilt of his head.
You don't make a sound.
He comes in again.
Again you extend your arms in an attempt to ward him off.
He tries and tries to kiss you.
But your arms are just long enough.
Finally he gives up and pulls back.
He shrugs his shoulders and says, "Well, thanks a lot. See you later." He turns and walks away.
You stare at your sisters with a look of horror.
"We thought you knew him!" they say in unison.
"I have never seen that ugly boy in my life!"

CSFTDBMS: Installment 2

Today, I want you to imagine you are working for a developing company that builds custom homes.
You deal with subcontractors all day long. You are just nice and pleasant with them because that's the way things should be.
Imagine that one of them who does, say, masonry comes in a lot.
He calls and is very nice. Starting to be overly nice.
You aren't concerned though because his wife comes in all the time too. You know he is absolutely married.
And she is awesome.
Well, imagine he comes in one day and asks why you aren't married and you tell him, oh I don't know, whatever you want.
Then he proceeds to tell you that he just doesn't understand and that he will leave his wife for you.
You tell him he is crazy
He responds with "Crazy for you."
Later that day, he calls and you are uncomfortable because he is a creep.
You ask him to hold.
He says, "I will wait forever for you."
You tell your boss.
He tells him he doesn't have any more masonry work left to do.
He doesn't call for a long time
Your company starts a new house, and he starts coming around again. Great.