FHE "Seminars"

So I got tricked into going to a dating seminar last night. It was disguised as Family Home Evening in my singles ward. I guess they probably announced that that was what it was going to be during the announcements that take twenty minutes during sacrament meeting. I tend to zone out, I'm not gonna lie. My friend twisted my arm into going. When I sat down and they started and I figured out what it was, I was tempted to get up and go. One thing I hate about single's wards is all the contrived ways to get people to date each other. It feels like a steel trap. But, I decided to stay, I mean, after all, I had already come and sat down. The speaker was actually pretty entertaining, and, as it turns out, very informative. I was indirectly informed that I do NOT know how to flirt. She started going on about all the ways women flirt and I came to the realization that I do NONE of these! Eye contact? Who makes eye contact with a guy they actually like? And smile at them? No way. And those are the two easy ones! One thing I have going for me is that she informed all the guys in the room that women do NOT flirt with the men they like. So if we are scowling at them, by all means, come and approach us because we like you. Oh, dating. Could it please be a little more difficult?

I have also been more directly informed that I am completely oblivious. When I got home, I called to catch up with my sister Shawna down at BYU, the land Bountiful. She told me she knew this guy who used to be in my BYU ward. Then she told me that he said he was totally into me back then but that I never gave him the time of day. Ok, this boy was a flirt and I figured he liked either my roommate or my roommate sister Alana. Besides I get all weird when I meet new people, and then he never talked to me, so I figured he hated my guts. Come to find out, none of those was the case. I just have blinders on. Like a horse. A blinded horse.

I guess it was a good thing this FHE was so "contrived." Now I can take off my pony shades and take a look around. And maybe I'll even smile at a guy that I am remotely attracted to rather than the weirdos I'm not afraid of.