Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The Renaissance Pokemon Master

Ok, imagine you get set up on another date. He gets your number from a source that will remain nameless. He calls you that afternoon. You chat for a bit and let him know you are leaving for Mexico on Friday. He asks if you can go out on Thursday night. You say, “Sure.” He adds you to facebook that day. This is all going very fast. 

Thursday rolls around. He picks you up. “He seems very nice,” you think to yourself. You start chit chatting, when he reveals that he has some really interesting hobbies. “Ok,” you think to yourself, “I’ll bite.”  

“What are your hobbies?”

“Well, I make chainmail.”

Instantly, the image of chain mail letters you get in your inbox from your 10 year old sisters saying that if you break the chain, you will be cursed with seven years of bad luck pops into your head.

“What exactly is chain mail?”

He whips something out of his pocket. A key chain he made. “You know that chain armor knights used to wear? That’s chain mail.”

“Oh, how very interesting,” you say.

He gives you a not so quick run-down (he’s a chatter box) on what is involved in making a shirt, for instance. Apparently it’s not very expensive, but very time intensive. You’ve got to hand it to him. It is an interesting hobby, who else do you know that makes chain mail? No one.

He then starts telling you about how he likes to wear the shirt he has made to Ren Fests. You quickly deduce that Ren Fests are Renaissance Festivals. Yes, he is one of those running around campus wielding a sword and speaking in gothic letters. 

You say, “I like four wheeling.”

You get to the bowling alley. You cream him. But you couldn’t help it. He wasn’t very good and last year you were very seriously considering buying your own pair of bowling shoes to make your weekly outing more affordable. 

He wants to go for ice cream. So you drive down State Street looking for a place to stop. He spots a Costco(never mind the Coldstone across the street. Not to be high maintenance or anything. But Costco?). You get some ice cream and get on the subject of your favorite job.

He chimes in, surprise. “My favorite job was when I was 15. I worked at a game shop. But since I wasn’t 16 they wouldn’t let me work the registers. So basically, I got paid to learn how to play the games and teach them to patrons. I loved it! But the best part was this: This was during the Pokemon craze. Every authorized Pokemon dealer had to have a Pokemon Master. And I got to be the Pokemon Master. “


Lauren Kay said...

I can't decide if the person who set you up should be fired for thinking you should go out with this person or given a standing ovation for the gem of a story. I'm in AW. And by aw (not awe) I mean, how AWkward/AWful/AWesome.

Jenny and Al said...

Ha ha! I remember you telling me about that date! (And I think I remembered who set you up, too. Ugh.)

Josh and Anna said...

I really hope you marry the him and have a Ren Fest themed wedding. So awesome:) Actually, with all the bachelors you have presented, I think you may be the smartest girl in the world for still being single and not settling for a retired Pokemon Master:)

Alana Nelson said...

i agree with anna. but i am crying. i think you tell the stories well and i remember this story vividly, but for some reason,you write them so much better. SO so so funny.

Lindsay said...

Ohmygosh, this is awesome. First and foremost, I love that you bowl so much. It brings me back to our Lodz district bowling outings. Also, Ren Fests. HA! Very good job figuring that one out- you are very intuitive! So he's one of the guys that I would seek out on BYU campus after I bombed a test in order to revive my good mood? Ahh, the Knights in Shining Armor Club...thank you for the smiles...

annalisa said...

Oh boy oh boy. I remember this one. & I remember not knowing what chain mail us either!! Srsly, does the setter upper hate you with the passion if a thousand chain mail swords???