Friday, October 30, 2009

Halloween Goodies

Look at what I made! I still have a long way to go when it comes to the kitchen, and photography for that matter, but I had a lot of fun making these last night for out Halloween party.
I made caramel apples with homemade caramel. Oodalally! I dipped them in white chocolate and then in cinnamon sugar. Kind of like Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory, but less attractive.
The one on the left looks devious. And he has a unibrow. How can you not love that? But my favorite it on the right. He is just so cute with his little hippo teeth.


Thursday, October 29, 2009

"I don't like confrontation!"

Ten points to those who got that movie reference. Anyway, I got a calling a few weeks ago. I was so worried when they called me out of Relief Society that I had been blacklisted for not being there so much. Like I had a big red target on my back. I was gone a lot over the summer, and the spring, and the previous winter... I went to church every week, just not to my ward. Anyway, they called me to be a ward missionary. So the Chairperson called me up to tell me about a meeting the following Sunday and also that I have a companion. And this companion is a boy. Excuse me, a man. My single's ward is a little older. The median age is like 27. I actually got called a spring chicken last night which is funny because I have been thinking that I am getting pretty old. Anyway, I went to the meeting and my "companion" wasn't there. I was relieved because I didn't really want to have to talk to him face to face just yet. You all know I'm nonconfrontational. Besides, I just knew he was going to be the biggest nerd in the ward. Nice attitude, right? Well, I got all caught up to speed and had my own little meeting with the ward mission leader and in walked my partner. My jaw dropped. Umm, he's definitely NOT a nerd. So we'll see if I can try to be more confrontational...

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I don't like the dogs

I have had animals on my mind lately what with the death of the family cat. Especially since they already have her replaced. Yes, they got a replacement cat. I went out and bought a new car as a replacement for someone. They got another cat. I have come to learn the root of my dislike of animals. My mom doesn't like animals... that may have something to do with it... Just sayin... But anyway, you know how you can turn one emotion into another? That is exactly what happened.

This is me when I was about four. Yes I had a mushroom hair cut. I think it was cute, in a hilarious kind of way. It's weird to think that I look exactly the same, but now I have hippie long hair. Anyway, when I was about two and a half my family moved to Texas. About a year and a half later, we moved back to Utah. And this is where the story begins. Business wasn't any better in Texas than in Utah, so we had to bring the equipment back. My dad had to bring the dump truck back. It was an old dump truck, like a beat up tonka truck left in the sand pile for a long time. I loved to ride with my dad, so I got to go with him. Now, there was no passenger seat in this particular truck, just floor space. So I got my Strawberry Shortcake blanket all spread out on the floor along with my Rainbow Brite doll. Well, because it was an old beat up dump truck, we could only go so fast. Like 45-50 mph fast. I remember stopping for gas. My dad let me get a bag of Cheetos and some Hawaiian Punch, then we were back on our way. On the second day of slow driving, we got a flat tire. Dad pulled off to the side of the road to fix it. I got out and sat on the side of the road and just cried my little eyes out.

"Daddy! I can't take it any more! I don't want to drive anymore!"

It just broke his heart, I mean look at that little face! Anyway, while he was fixing the flat and I was crying, a pack of wild dogs came and started chasing me. I was terrified beyond belief. My dad rescued me but I was scarred for the rest of my life. So the fear that experience created has turned to dislike over the years. And it has spread to all other animals. It's called generalization. I learned about it in college.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Allie

Yesterday, we laid to rest our cat, Allie. She was over eighteen years old. Anyone who knows me, knows I DO NOT like animals. Especially cats. But this one was different. She is the only cat I ever loved. I really am sad that she is gone. She was so laid back and sweet and knew not to jump up on or rub against me. But I think she knew I loved her just the same. I just loved her from a distance. She was always really good about not scratching kids who didn't know better. She tried to teach our idiot of a cat Callie some of her humble ways, but I think she was just too old. Allie has been limping around with pretty bad arthritis for a while, and she also lost one of her pointy teeth a while ago. It was a sad sight to see. Then, over this past weekend, something happened to her and she couldn't really walk at all. So my mom decided that we better do the humane thing. So farewell Allie. Please haunt Callie the moron and remind her how to be a good cat.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Money

Sometimes, I really hate money. Like this weekend. My tire pressure light came on and I knew that I was due for some new tires. But I just wanted to buy the front tires. I think the alignment got off when someone hit a curb... it wasn't me... So there were bad wear patterns where there wasn't really any tread left. Darn those wear patterns. So I took Beyonce (that's the name of my car. She's a little spitfire. And when she's really sassy, she goes by Sasha Fierce) to Big O. I mean, I trust those guys. Well, I told them I only wanted to get two new tires for her front. Well, the guy went out and quickly came back in and told me there was a screw in her back passenger tire. I guess that could explain the tire pressure light. Duh. So, I shouted "Fine! I'll get three new tires!!" Those babies are expensive. Bah. So I left and hoofed it home. Then I got a phone call and they told me that the other back tire was really worn too and they strongly advised me to buy another $80 tire. "Fine!!" I shouted again. A million dollars, four tires, and an alignment later, Beyonce is back in business.
I did all this before I remembered my dentist appointment this morning. I don't have dental insurance anymore, hence my not going to the dentist for the last two years... But I decided that my teeth are worth it. So I went and got a cleaning and an exam. I was afraid my dentist was going to start making cash register noises the second I openned my mouth. But he didn't. He actually said everything was looking really good. So only a half a million dollars and only relatively small cha-ching sound effects, I have cavity free and gleaming ivories. I wonder if I could sell my teeth to poachers for some cash.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Preggo's

I think pregnant people are really funny. Seriously, they crack me up. My BFF had her cute little tyke a little over two years ago. She got me edumacated about some of the things that happen when you are preggo. Like pregnant brain. For some reason, your brain goes out the window. And more people than just she has told me this. All of a sudden, you can't remember anything and you drop off midsentence leaving your listeners clueless. You can't ever decide what to eat and sometimes, you just don't know where you are. That makes me really excited to have kids...

Last night, my cousin clued me in on another thing that happens. I already knew it, I mean, my mom was pregnant all through my growing up years. I guess my cousin just reminded me. Pregnant people can't laugh too hard or too much. You hear a lot of "Oh, baby doesn't like that!" and "I gotta go!" or, "My tummy!"

I love it when preggo's say that "baby" wants this or that. "Baby is cold. It needs a blanket " or "Baby is tired. We have to go to bed." Sure blame it on the little shrimp inside you. I can't wait till I have that excuse: "I think the baby needs more cookies, and homemade ice cream... and more cereal" Pass it down!

I just figured it out, my mom was preggo for four and a half years starting from the time I was six. Of course there were a few breaks in there, but four and a half years. So I guess I know a lot of things about pregnancy. Like when your water breaks, you have time to take a shower and do your hair and put on make up before you have to go to the hospital. And everybody gets to go to Chuck-a-rama after they come and visit you and the babes. And you don't have to do the vacuuming for at least six weeks. And sometimes, if you have a mineral deficiency, you want to eat dirt. Mmm. Dirt.

I really, really can't wait for that.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Wrong Number

I got a text this morning. It said, "Good morning princess!" The number wasn't programmed into my phone and I didn't recognize the number. So I replied, "Well hello. Who is this?" He then replied, "Woops! I think I have the wrong number! Sorry!" Anyone who wants to call me princess can text me anytime.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Public Restrooms

Ok, since I was at a theme park in a humid place for five days straight, I learned a few things. One of these things is that my hair does not like humidity; I look like a buffalo wallow woman. Another, those big pretzels aren't that good when that's all you eat becasue everything is so freakin overpriced. Florida is hot. It makes you sweat. And it rains a lot in October. Who would have thought, I mean it is the end of hurricane season... I also learned I need to drink more water. Also, kids don't usually look around to see if people noticed that embarassing thing that just happened. Go to theme parks with people who love it like you do. Wear sunscreen. And I learned that I am not ashamed to sing Disney songs at the top of my lungs in the middle of a busy crowd. They tend to love it ;)

The most important lesson I learned though, is that I absolutely hate automatically flushing toilets in public restrooms. Who thought that was a good idea?! I suppose, in theory, it is pretty awesome. I mean, keeping things flushed can never be stressed enough. But, one wrong move and you get the worst bidet experience of your life.

Disneyworld

I just got back, well on Sunday I got back, from a whole week in Orlando. It was a blast. But I do have to say, that a whole week without my family is rough indeed. People in my past have told me that they don't really know what is really important to me. I guess I should just make it easy for them right here, right now: my family is number one. The whole week I kept thinking, "Oh this would be so much fun if the little girls were here to see it!" Or, "Oh my, Alana would die that's so funny!" Or, "My dad would just love this!" Or, "Mason would LOVE this roller coaster!" Anyway, I learned a lot about myself. I'm a big baby. And I get homesick.

I was however in the happiest place on earth... so naturally I had a really good time. I am really good at keeping myself entertained, especially when I am surrounded by tons of entertainment. I went to Disneyland my junior year of high school. I was a little underwhelmed. I wanted rollercoasters. I couldn't really understand what all the hype was over all that stuff. Well, this time, I totally got it. I love Disneyworld. I am sure I would love Disneyland. I felt like a little kid again. It made me want to come home and watch every Disney movie ever made. It really was magical!

I can't believe how much detail is in every little thing. They had a Swiss Family Robinson tree with the bamboo water chutes and everything. When you had to wait in line for a ride, it was in the theme of the ride. So, I was in a dungeon waiting for Pirates of the Carribbean and a creepy hotel for the tower of terror. The electric parade made my entire trip worth it, and Fantasmic was absolutely incredible. They had shows going all the time and things for old and young and young at heart, which, coincidentally, I am all three.

I ran into my friend's parents while at Animal kingdom (which was my favorite). Talk about a small world. (I liked that ride too - It's a Small World). The roller coasters were great and we went on a real safari. A safari! I can definitely see why people get all excited about Disneyland. One day, when I have kids, we're going.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Dan in Real Life


One of my favorite movies these days is Dan in Real Life. I love this movie. LOVE it. Thanks goes to my sister Laura for giving it to me for my birthday. I watch it at least every two weeks when I can't squeeze it in to once a week. That means that I have watched it five times in the last seven weeks...which is no exaggeration. I tend to get on a kick and ride it out for a while. When I was a senior in high school, I watched Never Been Kissed every weekend. No joke. Then I fell in love with Mamma Mia and watched it over and over...and over again.
But back to Dan. It is just so hilarious. And real. Why don't they make more movies like this? I mean, I love it when I can identify with characters. I can't very well identify with action movie stars because, well, the most danger I am ever in is actually not my own danger at all. It belongs to the unfortunate soul who tries to wake me from my deep slumber. I like romantic comedies that aren't over the top. And this, is not over the top. I was a little weirded out by the fact that I was attracted to Michael Scott. I guess it was his human-ness. I don't understand why the cover has him with his head in a stack of pancakes, but that's ok. But it has some of the best lines. Ever.

"YOU. ARE. A. MURDERER OF LOVE!"

"I can think of things myself, I'm in the fourth grade."

"I am going to try to make myself...less attractive."

"I don't want to go with the pig face!"

"This corn is like an angel."


And then there is that sweet scene where he sings "Let My Love Open The Door." Too cute.

(I could probably quote a lot more, but as I am typing I am listening to Elvis and he, the love of my life, is distracting me).


Anyway, I love this movie. I think you should love it too.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

I miss my Alana!

My sister and I have the coolest jobs. Let me rephrase that: we had the coolest jobs until Alana was transferred last week to another office with no internet connection. We both work in offices that are really slow, so that means we can be doing lots of different things other than work. Refer to my Boredom post... Anyway, we used to chat online all day. "Napolean, you are just jealous because I have been chatting online with babes all day." I know all you guys wish you were us. But now that Alana isn't on the other line, it doesn't have much of a draw anymore. Stalking people has somehow lost its appeal. Imagine that. My youtube video searches have severely slowed pace. Alana has taken up word searches and she might even start reading. I curse doctor's offices who won't give out their internet code thingies. Just let her get on! I miss my Alana!

Friday, October 2, 2009

Yuck

I just bit into a nasty pear. Disgusting.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Movies

I love movies. I love going to movies. I love quoting movies.I love watching movies. I just love them. The only problem is, I inherited something from my mother. It is something that drives me nuts. I don't think I could name the last movie she saw all the way through. She just conks out. Like mother, like daughter. Now, sometimes I can control it and watch a movie from previews to credits, but when I am at home snuggled in a blanket, it just happens. Sometimes it happens when I am at other people's house. It is super annoying. Now, anyone who has been around when I get woken up, knows it can be a pretty funny experience. I wake up throwing punches, terrified out of my mind, furious and muttering threats, and rarely do I wake up without making a fuss. It happened again last night.